


Refugee Zim

by GibbyTheCookie



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Dib’s a Nice Big Brother, Family, Friendship, GIR’s a Cinnamon Roll, Gaz Cares About Her Family, Professor Membrane is a good dad, The Irken Empire Wants Him Dead, Zim Needs a Hug, Zim is a Membrane, Zim’s a Refugee on Earth
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:26:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23447743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GibbyTheCookie/pseuds/GibbyTheCookie
Summary: In an alternate universe where The Tallest have marked him for destruction, Zim has fled across the galaxy to an undiscovered planet and is taken in by the Membranes. Now Dib and Gaz have to look after their extraterrestrial little brother while otherworldly forces try to return him to Irk. Can they protect him or is he destined to be erased. All hail Jhonen Vasquez! ZaDf
Comments: 6
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter One

I posted this on FanFiction.Net before I decided to migrate here. This is my take on an Invader Zim AU. Here, Zim is labeled as defective far earlier than the series and he is marked for destruction by the Irken Empire. This AU begins about 2 earth decades after Zim's trial, and Zim has been on the run the entire time, looking for some place where the Irkens will never find him…

xXxXx

I have to get away! The Spittle Runners! They're closing in! GIR! Get away from the weapons console! We need to fight back or we're burnt space toast! No! To late! Eh? We're hit! Well, only one option now!

Sir. I don't believe activating the hyperdrive in this condition is a good idea.

You dare inform me of what I already know! It's our only choice!

YAY! WE'RE DOOMED!

Nyeah!

xXxXx

Dib Membrane sat on top of the shed in the backyard, staring up at the sky, the stars reflecting off his large, round glasses. He could get lost in these stars for hours. Unfortunately, his family didn't accommodate for this.

"Dib! Dad says come in for dinner!"

That was Gaz, his sister. Her squinted, amber eyes glared up at him from under her purple bangs.

"Ask him if I can stay out just a little longer."

"He thought you'd say that, and he said get in there now!"

"Fine," Dib sighed. "I'm coming."

Dib slid down the water spout and walked across the yard towards Gaz. Suddenly, a loud explosion shook the ground, causing both of them to stumble. Dib looked up to see some kind of spacecraft, engulfed in flames, imbedded into the yard were he had been standing just a moment ago. The large, round windshield opened, and pinkish smoke billowed out. A moment later, to eyes, each one a bright ruby color, locked onto them. Soon, a small, green head followed the eyes and a strange creature staggered out of the wreck. It stared at the human children for a moment, before its eyes went vacant and its body went limp.

xXxXx

Slowly, the alien opened it's large eyes and looked around. First off, his ship. The fire was out, and the damages were not beyond repair. Second, he seemed to be in some kind grassy courtyard. Thirdly, and most alarmingly of all, he was tied up with a leather belt and two creatures he did not recognise were staring at him.

"Insolent creatures! Unhand Zim!"

"I can't believe it, Gaz! A real alien!" Dib cleared his throat and turned to Zim, trying to look intimidating. Gaz scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"So, Alien. Why did you come to earth? To enslave humanity? To eat our brains? Answer me!"

Zim laughed. "I assure you, dirt-child, I came to this mudball completely by accident. As you can see by my ship, I was under attack."

Zim looked around before nodding, a huge, zipper-toothed grin spreading over his face.

"Y'know, this place is very far away from Irk. It's not even on any known maps. Yes, this could work."

The small alien turned his attention to the humans, who were watching him curiously.

"I have decided! Dirt-babies! You shall be my guide to this planet while I hide here! Another expertly crafted plan by ZIM!"

"Hold on! What makes you think we're going to trust you? We don't know anything about you! How can we be sure that you won't try to eat our brains or whatever?"

Zim looked confused for a moment, before a smirk crossed his face.

"Y'know, you creatures are more cautious than you look. Or maybe you're just a special case. Either way, I have no allegiance to the Empire anymore, and if you release me I am willing to answer any questions you may have."

Dib thought this over. Was he really willing to let this alien… thing… loose just in hopes of a better understanding of the universe? He might be dangerous. He might hurt people. But when would he ever get another chance like this? It was so tempting. Finally, he caved.

"Alright. C'mon, you."

Once he was untied, Zim got to his feet and stretched a bit. Surprisingly, he had no injuries from the crash, though his uniform was in tatters. He would have to ask the dirt-babies for spare clothing. In the meantime, they would need to blend in, and he had just the thing.

"GIR! Minimoose! Get out here!"

Out of the smoldering ship, two robots emerged and stood before them. One was a typical robot, shaped not unlike a human. It was small and stared at the humans with vapid fascination with two glowing, blue eyes. The other was shaped like a small purple moose. It was totally wall-eyed and floated about three feet off the ground.

"I have decided that we will be hiding on this planet for a while, which means we will need disguises."

Zim tapped his finger against his chin before turning to Dib.

"Do you have moose-creatures on this planet?"

Dib nodded and Zim said, "I guess you're okay then, Minimoose."

The tiny moose squeaked in response and floated back towards the ship. The diminutive alien marched to the back of the ship and pulled open a console with a selection screen on it.

"Computer! Prepare disguises for Earth creatures!"

The screen instantly filled with a list of human costumes. Zim swiped through them until he came to one that was simply a wig and a pair of human-like contact lenses.

"That one looks good."

"That one?" Gaz asked. "You're kidding, right?"

"DO NOT QUESTION MY METHODS!"

Zim clicked on the chosen disguise and the two pods on the sides of his ship lowered, closing around him, and began vibrating.

"AH! OOO! WHY DOES IT HURT?!" Zim screamed from inside.

After a moment, the pods opened again, revealing Zim in his new disguise.

"Master! Where did you go? Where are you?"

"I'm right here, GIR! It's me!"

Zim then grabbed hold of GIR's arm and led him to the pods.

"Alright, for you, I'm thinking maybe a dog."

Zim selected a random breed on the screen and the pods closed around GIR. After a moment, the pods opened to reveal GIR wearing a poorly-made, green dog costume with a zipper clearly visible and two large, glassy eyes.

"INGENIOUS! Now, we-"

"What is going on out here?"

Dib and Gaz's father, Professor Membrane, came out of the house and stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of the smoldering vehicle and the green stranger in his backyard.

Dib reacted first.

"Uh-we-uh… Dad? This is our friend, Zim. He accidently crashed his… go-kart in our yard. Is it okay if he spends the night with us?"

Membrane's confused face quickly turned to one of happiness.

"Well, of course! Look at my children making friends! Just make sure you clean up the yard, okay?"

As he walked back into the house, Zim, Dib and Gaz all released a breath they didn't realize they'd been holding.

xXxXx

Dinner was eaten mostly in silence, with a little conversation between the Professor and Zim here and there. Professor Membrane seemed to really like the strange, green boy sitting at his table, and his children were just glad that he didn't seem to find anything unusual about him.

After dinner, Dib led Zim, GIR and Minimoose to his room while Gaz went to her room to play video games.

"We'll have to get you out of those rags. Here, let me get that for you," Dib said, grabbing hold of Zim's metal backpack.

Suddenly, he found himself pinned to the ground by four, long metal legs protruding from the aforementioned backpack and Zim right above him with a look of pure rage stretched across his features.

"You dare try to remove Zim's PAK? After our truce, you dare try to kill me?!"

"What are you talking about? What did I do wrong?"

Zim's rage slowly melted from his face. He got back up and the spider legs retreated back into his PAK.

"No, you're right. You couldn't have known about that. Escentially, this PAK is my battery life. If I'm without it for more than ten of your earth minutes, I would die a slow, painful death."

"I-I'm sorry," Dib stammered. "I didn't know."

"Eh. It's fine. Nothing happened."

"Here," Dib said, handing Zim a purple hoodie and some sweatpants. "I think this will fit you."

Zim gasped. "IT'S PURPLE!"

"Do you… like purple?"

Instead of answering, Zim slipped out of his tattered uniform and threw the hoodie on over his head. After a moment, his smile faltered and he lifted the hoodie back over his head and turned his back to Dib.

"Is something wrong?"

"No, Dib-creature. I just need you to hold my PAK for a second."

Dib did a double-take. "But didn't you say you'd die if-"

"It'll be fine. It's only for a few seconds and I need to put holes in the hoodie for it."

Dib did as he was told and placed both his hands on the sides and the PAK popped off in his hands. Zim shuddered for a moment, but slipped the hoodie back over his head without further complaint. Once he did, two small mechanical tentacles shot from the PAK, cutting two perfect circles into the back, before reattaching itself to Zim's spine.

"Are you okay?"

"Of course I'm fine. I AM ZIM!"

Dib chuckled a bit until something came to him.

"Hey. You said before that you wanted to hide here from someone."

Zim suddenly looked a little uncomfortable.

"Yes, I said that."

"Who were you hiding from?"

Zim sighed and sat down next to GIR at the foot of Dib's bed.

"The Irken Empire."


	2. Chapter Two

Dib awoke to the sound of his alarm clock blaring and the sight of Zim, staring at him with his purple contact-covered eyes and sitting on the floor with one of the books that had been sitting his shelf.

"Didn't you get any sleep last night?" he asked groggily as he sat up and rubbed his eyes.

"Irkens don't require sleep. Our PAK's supply us with all the energy we need."

"So you can't sleep, or-"

"OF COURSE WE CAN! But think about it. The average sentient life-form spends a third of their miserable lives asleep. It's a waste of time! Irkens have alleviated the problem by using the PAK's energy levels to keep our bodies functioning."

Suddenly, the door burst open and Professor Membranes metal boots clacked against the wooden floor as he entered the room.

"Good morning, children. Zim, was it? It's almost 10:00. Shouldn't you be getting home to your family? If you want, I can call them."

Zim began to sweat nervously and Dib, not really thinking, spouted the first thing that came to his head.

"He's an orphan! He doesn't have a family!"

After a beat of silence, Membrane let out a hearty laugh.

"Well, why didn't you say so? Zim, welcome to the Membrane family."

"WHAT?! But-"

"No worries, son. It shouldn't take more than a few minutes."

"But Dad-!"

But the Professor was already out the door, leaving the child, the alien and his two strange robots sitting in silence.

"Eh… what just happened?" Zim asked.

xXxXx

Dib, Zim and GIR shuffled down the stairs with Minimoose floating lazily behind and peeked behind the doorway of the kitchen.

"You know, honey? It's strange that none of the local orphanages had any records on your new brother, so it's a good thing I'm so amazing. The adoption is official. Anyway, I've gotta get to the labs. See you tonight!"

After the door had slammed shut, Dib dared to peek out from behind the door, only to immediately be caught by Gaz's evil-looking glare. She sat at the table eating a bowl of Poop Flakes, but didn't break her angry glare.

"What did you DO?!"

"I dunno! I panicked!"

"And now we're stuck with that green freak for the next ten-or-so years because of you!"

"And what would you have done? Told dad that an alien landed in our backyard last night and wait for him to send FBI agents here for an autopsy?"

"Listen, I'm not saying we should leave him alone to rot on this unfamiliar ball of dirt, but I-"

"Do you got nachos?"

Gaz's squinted eyes went to the bright blue eyes of Zim's android, now standing beside her chair.

"Uh… they're in the cabinet."

Zim marched in as GIR rushed over to the cabinets and sat down between his new siblings.

"Humans, I understand that I am now under the custody of your filthy earth-master."

Zim continued as Dib tried to keep Gaz from slugging him.

"But I will be fine here. I trust you two with my safety and I can assure you that you will have a great time here with ZIM!"

"I'm not on board with this," Gaz muttered.


	3. Chapter Three

“Class, I'd like to introduce the newest hopeless appendage to the student body. His name is Zim Membrane."

Miss Bitters, the 6th Grade homeroom teacher, stood beside Zim who was nervously scratching at his wig at the front of the classroom.

"Zim, if you have something to say, say it now. Because after this moment, I don't want to hear another sound from you!"

Miss Bitters slunk back to her desk, leaving Zim standing in front of the class. He waved at the students and smiled.

"Hello, friends! I am a perfectly normal human worm baby. You have nothing, absolutely nothing to fear from me. Just pay no attention to me and we'll get along just fine."

Zim marched to his seat right behind Dib and sat down.

"How come the Gaz-Creature didn't come with us?"

"The skool divides kids into grades depending on how old they are. Gaz is a year younger than me."

"Eh? At the academy, smeets are kept underground for ten years right after hatching until they are deemed soldiers by the empire."

"You came from an egg?"

"No, of course not! Irken smeets are grown in cloning pods. The Irken Empire hasn't used biological reproduction in millenia!"

"Zim? Dib? Do you have something you'd like to share with the class?" Miss Bitters sneered.

"No, Miss Bitters!" Dib answered immediately.

After a moment of silence, Zim's voice once again found its way into Dib's ear.

"Has anyone ever told you you have a very big head?"

xXxXx

Lunch wasn't much to write home about. Zim, Dib and Gaz all sat together at one of the filthy cafeteria tables. Zim and Dib bought the cafeteria food while Gaz opted to pack her own sack lunch. Dib honestly wasn't picky and was willing to eat anything that was provided for him. Zim kept sniffing and poking at the dish on his tray (today the cafeteria was serving some kind of bean glop) and Dib looked over at him with his eyebrows raised.

"What's the matter? Don't you have beans on Irk?"

Zim scoffed. "Of course! I love beans! Love them!"

"Dib, leave space-boy here alone. He doesn't have to eat the beans if he doesn't want to."

"But Gaz, he's going to go hungry! Doesn't that worry you?"

Gaz merely shrugged. Zim growled in annoyance and snatched the fork off the table.

"Alright, alright! I'll try just one bite!"

Zim scooped the beans up with the spoon and shoved it into his mouth. After a few moments, smoke of some kind began to curl up from the inside of Zim's mouth, his head began to swell slightly and his contact-covered eyes went wide. In a panic, he spat the beans out onto the floor and began to roll on the floor, howling in pain and alerting all the students and teachers around them. Dib and Gaz helped the still-screaming Zim back to his feet as Miss Bitters slithered over to them, her lip twitching in annoyance.

"What's going on in here?"

"Zim had some kind of allergic reaction to the school lunch," Dib said as Zim continued to squirm and scream.

"Then take him home. The school can't afford another burial plot."

"Wait, what did she say?!" cried Zim between screams as Dib and Gaz led him out the door.

xXxXx

"I do not like beans," Zim muttered sickly as his adoptive siblings led him into the house. GIR and Minimoose were on the couch watching Floopsy Boops Shmoopsy. Zim took off his wig and contacts and coughed into his sleeve.

"GIR!"

GIR's eyes turned bright red and he lept off the couch and gave his master a firm solute.

"Yes, my lord!"

"GIR, my head is… it's…"

"It's grotesque!" GIR finished, as his eyes returned to their normal color and a huge grin spreading across his metal face.

"Yes, make it less so."

"Okee-dokie!"

The top of GIR's head opened and before the humans could ask what was happening, GIR jumped atop Zim's head and began to siphon the pus from his skull, filling a large plastic bag that protrude from his feet. Once Zim's head was back to normal size, GIR hopped off and ran away to do who-knows-what with the bag.

"Ah-ha! No beans shall furthermore make a fool of Zim! And I got you both out of school for the day. You're welcome."

"I'm going to my room," Gaz said and marched up the stairs. Dib walked over to Zim and grabbed his gloved hand.

"Perfect. C'mon. I want to show you something," he said as he shoved Zim's disguise back to him and dragged him out the door. He led him to the shed in the backyard and pulled a strange-looking vehicle from inside.

"What is that… two-wheeled weirdness…?"

"It's the Dib Mobile. It's how I get around town."

"Wait! I wanna come too!"

The boy and the alien turned to see GIR running towards them, pulling his doggy costume on as waddled up.

"I wanna come wit' you's!"

"Uh… I don't know if that's such a good idea," Dib said.

"No, it's fine," Zim replies, waving his hand dismissively. "GIR, though he may not look it, is a Standard issue Information Retrieval unit. He was designed to absorb information on any planet. As this is a new planet, I, Zim, think it is a good idea."

"Alright, if you say so."

So Dib hopped on and pulled Zim onto the back with him while GIR latched onto Zim's PAK and held on tight.

xXxXx

"When can I remove this accursed eye-cover?"

"When we get there. C'mon, you can be more patient than that, can't you?"

"ZIM IS THE DEFINITION OF 'PATIENT'!"

"Hee-hee! You're funny, Master!"

"Alright. We're here. You can take off the blindfold."

Zim removed the blindfold and looked around. He was in some kind of building. The area they were standing in now was filled with tables and booths and with multiple patrons eating various breakfast items and sweets.

"Where are we?" Zim asked, scanning the area.

"This is The International Home of Waffles, or IHOW. You didn't get to eat anything today, so I thought I'd take you here."

"WAFFLES?!" GIR cried in enthusiasm, his large, fake eyes shining with excitement.

"Well, they don't only have waffles. They have pancakes, bacon, toast, various lunch meals-"

"Well, my squeedily-spooch is a little grumbly, so might as well. Y-you're sure I won't get hurt eating here, right?"

"Sure I'm sure. All I've seen you eat here is sugar and this place sells meals that are mostly sugar. You'll be fine"

xXxXx

"Okay, note to self: You can't eat meat either."

Zim simply glared at Dib as he continued to scrub the burn marks on his mouth away with a bar of what he called "cleansing chalk" in the restaurant's bathroom.

"How was I supposed to know that the sausage that came with the waffles wasn't safe for you?"

"Oh, forget it. From now on, Zim will decide what and where we eat."

xXxXx

Gaz looked up from her Game Slave at the sound of a knock on her bedroom door.

"What?" she growled to her unknown visitor. The door slowly opened and Minimoose floated in and squeaked at her.

"No, I don't want to play with you. Go away."

Minimoose squeaked again and a hatch in his back and a device suspiciously similar to Gaz's Game Slave slid out on the end of a small, metal arm and lowered in front of the robots face. A second later, a bing emanated from Gaz's system.

"Challenger approaching. MooseMan424 would like to battle. Accept?"

"You really want to take me on?"

"Nyeah!"

Gaz smirked. "Alright, but don't say I didn't warn you."


	4. Chapter Four

"Zim? What are you doing?" Dib asked as he walked up to where the small alien messing with the wires behind the control panel next to the front door.

"Ah, Dib-human! You are just in time to see one in a long list of brilliant ideas from Zim! I am downloading my computers AI into your filthy house, making more advanced than anything else on this stinking planet.

"AI? You mean the really rude one that wouldn't shut up about my head?"

Zim hummed, a hint of annoyance. "I admit that the sarcasm factor does require a little fine-tuning. But trust in Ziiiiiim! This is the most advanced AI in the known universe, and you will be quite thankful."

A few more adjustments later, and the AI hummed to life, causing the entirety of the house to vibrate.

"Online," it said in its usual melancholy voice.

Zim then took notice of the briefcase in Dib's hand.

"Eh? Where are you going?"

"Oh, there have been a bunch of reported sightings of Sea Horse Men in the area. Wanna join me?"

Zim shuddered at the thought of what had happened the last time he had come into contact with water.

"As fun as that sounds, Zim has some important, oh so important, things to do. So I'll see you later."

Dib shrugged and ran out the door, leaving Zim to sit on the floor. He smirked. Now, with no more distractions, he was free to...

xXxXx

Zim was stretched across the couch, bored to tears as an episode of The Scary Monkey Show played on TV, going ignored by the Irken.

"Computer, where is everybody?"

"Dib went to look for Sea Centaurs or something and he dragged GIR off with him, Professor Membrane is at work, and Gaz and Minimoose are upstairs playing video games."

Zim's antennea twitched involantarily.

"Wait, the Gaz-creature is still here with Minimoose?!"

"Uh, yeah?"

Zim, without a moment's waste, raced up the stairs to Gaz's room and flung open the door. Inside, Minimoose was squeaking triumphantly and Gaz punched the floor in agitation.

"NO, NO, NO! HOW CAN SOMETHING WITH NO HANDS BE SO GOOD?!"

"Uh, am I interrupting something?" Zim asked. Gaz merely glared at him.

"They've been at this for 12 hours straight," the Computer supplied.

"I'm ruined. I was doing a live stream when he challenged me. No the entire gaming community knows that I've been bested by a moose."

Zim fidgetted uncomfortably. He wasn't used to such a display from someone usually so quiet. His mind suddenly jumped back to something that had happened the day before…

Ten Hours Ago…

"Zim? Are you in here?

Dib had just finished prying open the air vent in the ceiling of his bedroom. Peering inside, he could see the light from Zim's PAK as he worked to heal him from the numerous burns he had received that day.

"LEAVE ZIM BE!"

"If I give you a lollipop, will you come out?"

There was a pause, followed by Zim's voice.

"Is it the cherry kind?"

"Mm-hm!"

Dib sighed in relief as Zim's large, ruby eyes appeared from the darkness, followed closely by the rest of him. He snatched the candy from Dib's hand and proceeded to tear off the wrapper and silently suck on it.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"This planet is an abomination! A hazardly abominable planet for Ziiiiiim!"

"It's not so bad. There's plenty to like here."

"Name one thing!"

Dib smirked. "Well, the candy, for one."

Zim's scowl was replaced by a look of recognition as he took the lolly pop out of his mouth and looked at it.

"And you like staying here with us, right?"

After a pause, Zim said, "My stay here so far has been rather enjoyable."

"See? You gotta take the bad with the good, otherwise you can never make it through life."

Climbing up into the vent next to him, Dib sat cross-legged and Zim leaned back against the wall, focusing on the wall before him.

"Want to hear a song my mom used to sing to me when I was upset?"

Zim's antenna twitched, and he nodded before lying down with his head on Dib's legs.

"Let's go in the garden.

You'll find something waiting,

Right there where you left it,

Lying upside down.

"When you finally find it,

You'll see how it's faded.

The underside is lighter,

When you turn it around.

"Everything stays,

Right where you left it.

Everything stays,

But it still changes.

Ever so slightly,

Daily and nightly,

In little ways,

Everything stays."

Zim looked at Gaz, still kneeling on the floor with Minimoose still hovering above her.

"Minimoose! Go check on the progress of the Voot's repairs!"

"Nyeah!" the little robot replied before floating out the door, leaving the Human and Irken alone. After a moment, Gaz looked up at Zim, her eyes red from angry tears and a lack of sleep.

"What do you want?" she asked coldly.

"Do you want to tell Zim about it?" he asked.

Cocking an eyebrow, Gaz said, "What are you, my mom? Go away."

"ZIM WILL DO NO SUCH THING! TELL ME OF YOUR TROUBLES, HUMAN!"

Gaz just stared at him. She wasn't sure what it was, but she felt like talking to him was a good way to get this feeling of heaviness off her chest.

"Do you ever have something that you're so good at, that you don't think anyone can beat you at it?"

"Of coarse! Zim is the best at everything!"

Gaz rolled her eyes. "This was a mistake!" her brain was yelling, but she still chose to ignore it.

"Well, video games were my thing. But that stupid robot of yours just ran me into the ground and the whole world saw it."

Thinking over what she just said, Zim put his hand on her shoulder, causing her to visibly stiffen.

"I still think you're pretty great."

Gaz's eyes popped open. That was new. Dib never complimented her like that. He wasn't mean or rude, he just never made her abilities seem so grand. Maybe it was that everything Zim said made it sound grand, but she appreciated it nonetheless.

"Heh. Thanks. You know, I haven't slept for almost a day."

"Ooh! Zim will serenade you with his incredible singing voice!"

Before she could protest, Zim began singing, to her surprise, her mother's song. He messed up a few parts, and was quite pitchy, but she was soon lying on the floor, sound asleep.

xXxXx

"I can't believe you had to bite one of the Sea Horse Men," Dib mumbled as he dragged GIR through the door. It had been a long day of failed monster hunting and the less said about it the better.

"Hee-hee! Fishy man go AAAHHH! Hee-hee!"

GIR jumped onto the couch and flipped on the TV as Dib dragged himself up the stairs.

"Zim! I'm back!"

To his surprise, Zim was not in their room. After a few moments he found him asleep next to Gaz on her bedroom floor. He smiled at the look of content on both their faces before picking Gaz up and tucking her into bed. Then he did the same with Zim. At first he had a hard time figuring out where to put him since he didn't make a habit of sleeping. Finally, he decided on his old sleeping bag, which he set up at the foot of his bed. Finally climbing into bed, he flicked off the lights and drifted off to sleep.


	5. Chapter Five

Dib awoke to the sound of Zim violently banging on a pot with a large wooden spoon.

"Your early morning consumption time has commenced!" he said with a wide grin stretched across his zipper-like teeth. "Come stuff your face holes!"

Dib glanced over at his alarm clock. 5:20 AM. With a groan, he rolled out of bed, almost landing directly on GIR, who was lying curled up on the floor. Following Zim down the stairs to the kitchen, he found a dead-eyed, exhausted-looking Gaz and Professor Membrane, who was the definition of "Alive, Alert, Awake, Enthusiastic."

"Good morning, son! Your green brother was just telling me about how he was preparing some of his own native foods for us!"

"Native foods…? You mean-!"

"Yes, he told me all about his early life in Holland and how he learned to cook from a young age."

Dib shot a look of confusion at Zim who couldn't stop smiling at his own ruse going over so smoothly.

"Yes, yes. I have prepared plenty of delicious "Hall-End" food for you to gorge your disgusting faces on."

Zim military-marched back to the stove and came back with a plate of some kind of purple bitterballen and four bowls of endive stew that looked and smelled like, well, urine.

The reactions from the three humans differed quite a bit. Professor Membrane downed the whole meal without complaint, even complimenting Zim for the unique flavor. Dib pretended to eat, but when Zim wasn't looking, he dumped the contents of his dishes down GIR's throat when he came and sat underneath the table to play with Dib's old Mail-Men action figures. Gaz didn't even make an attempt to eat her food, instead opting to lay her messy, purple head on the table and sleep.

After their meal, Membrane went to his home lab to get ready for work while Dib went upstairs to get ready for school. Gaz stayed where she was, mumbling something about taking a sick day.

xXxXx

That day, Zim was introduced to the primitive human game of Dodgeball. Credit where credit's due, Zim's small size and speed made him very hard to hit and he was quite enjoying himself, up until he got hit in what he called his "speedily-spooch" and had to sit out for the rest of the game.

At lunch, Zim ate his peanut butter and jelly sandwich (one of the few human meals he found that he could stomach without having a serious allergic reaction) and noticed a boy about his size with a big, happy smile and bright red hair walking towards him and Dib's table.

"Hey, Dib. Who's this?"

"Oh. Hey Keef. It's been a while. This is Zim. He's… well…"

"I am the latest, most brilliant installment to the Membrane household," Zim said much louder than he needed to. Keef didn't seem to notice as he reached up and shook Zim's hand.

"Wow! I didn't know you had a brother!"

"Well, he-"

Before he could continue however, an explosion reverberated around the cafeteria, causing all students and staff members to lose their balance and fall to the floor. The west-side wall had been blown apart, and in the center of the smoldering bricks was a small female irken with teal eyes and a dark blue tunic with several bionic attachments that connected to her PAK. She surveyed the children with cold, unblinking compound eyes.

"I am Bountyhunter Kitch, elite agent of the Irken Empire. I seek the dangerous criminal known as Irken Zim. If you hand him over quietly, I will leave without causing further damage. But if you don't… well, that's one less planet, I suppose."

The whole cafeteria remained silent as Kitch walked across the linoleum floors, her finely polished boots making a clicking sound as she went.

"No one? Oh, come now. Surely one of you has seen him. I tracked his ship here and this city's not this big after all. Tiny? Green? Screams a lot?"

Not getting anywhere, a limb resembling a large, green eye folded out from her PAK and began scanning the room, casting everything it's light in an eerie light. Finally, after everyone had been holding their breaths for several seconds, the scanner went over Dib's table and the light turned red.

"Ah! There you are!"

One of the extra limbs on her PAK launched towards them, latching onto Zim's PAK and pulling him out from his hiding place under the table. He flew, flailing his arms and legs towards Kitch and her smug expression.

"Irken Zim, by the power invested in me as a bounty hunter of the mighty Irken Empire, you are under arrest. You will be transported to Judgementia where you will be judged for your crimes by The Almighty Tallest and Control Brains."

"Release me, you horrible-!"

Zim's rant was cut off by Kitch sending several volts of electricity through Zim's PAK, causing him to spasm and go limp. Then, without a word, she whistled and a ship, one much larger than Zim's voot runner, appeared hovering a few feet above the ground. A beam of pink light appeared, lifting the Irken Bounty Hunter and her prisoner into it. Then, it blast off into the sky, blasting most of the children off their feet.

Dib took advantage of the commotion and ran out of the cafeteria towards home. This was bad. This was very, very bad. He had to get home. He had to go after him. He had to-

"DIB!"

Dib turned around to see Keef running towards him. He came to a stop as Keef slowed to a stop, panting for breath.

"What… huff… what just happened…?"

Dib sighed.

"Zim's been taken prisoner and I have to go save him."

"Can I help?"

"What?"

"Can I help you save your brother?"

"Uh… I don't know…"

"C'mon! There's strength in numbers, and you're my friend! I want to help!"

Dib sighed again. He wouldn't really call him and Keef "friends", but he did see his logic. He probably shouldn't do this by himself.

xXxXx

"So, let me get this straight. Zim's an alien who crashed in your backyard. You're dad decided to adopt him and he's been living here since?"

"Yep," Dib said, stuffing his bag with food and supplies for their journey.

"How long ago was that?" Keef asked.

"About a week."

"Why was he on the run anyway?"

"Zim isn't the best at… logical thinking. He made some bad choices in the past and his race wants him brought in for it."

Dib recalled the conversation they had on Zim's first night here. Apparently he had caused several blackouts on his empire's planets, inadvertently caused the death of two of their leaders. Zim described all of these events as misunderstandings. He had thought he had the smeet equipping room to himself when he accidentally caused the hatchery tube to overload, or his biological experiments had simply grown out of his control and eaten the Tallest on two different occasions.

But it had all culminated to the reason he went on the lam in the first place. In an effort to expand, Irk had announced Operation Impending Doom, and to keep Zim out of trouble, the Tallest had told him to stay in a drawn circle just for him. But Zim didn't realize that they had never left Irk, got ahold of one of the giant mechs in the armory, and went on a rampage through the capital city. The Tallest had decided that they've had enough and commissioned Zim to be erased, but he escaped and had been on the run ever since. Dib could honestly simpethise with Zim's story even though he couldn't exactly agree with the choices that had got him there in the first place. But he knew what it was like to do everything in your power to receive the respect and love of people who shun you.

Dib was knocked out of his thoughts by the sound of Gaz clearing her throat. She was standing in the door of his room with a duffle bag slung over her shoulder.

"I'm coming too."

"Really? What's the catch?"

"No catch. I'm going to help you two idiots save the green idiot."

"Really? Because you're not exactly the kind of person to help people out of the goodness of your heart."

"Shut up! Despite what you think, I like having a family. I'm not gonna let that get torn apart just because Zim decided to get captured."

"Really?"

"Yes. Now, let's go get an alien."

xXxXx

Dib groaned. Zim's ship had finished auto-repairing itself a few days ago, but the over-the-top, complicated controls were completely "alien" to him.

"Does it come with an instructional manual?" Keef asked from beside him.

"Don't be stupid!" Gaz hissed from her spot on the floor in the back.

"Wait. That's actually not a bad idea. Fan out. Look for a book of some kind."

After a few minutes of searching the ship, Dib located a thick book with a teal cover and Zim's alien insegna on the front.

"All right, guys. Let's get this puppy into the air-"

Dib's voice stopped in his throat as he opened the manual and he almost screamed. It was in a language that he couldn't have read after eight years of studying.

"Well, that's just great. Now what do we do?" Gaz said scowling.

"I CAN DO IT!"

The three children looked down from the cockpit to see GIR sitting in the front lawn.

"What's that?" Keef asked.

"It's Zim's stupid robot." Gaz mumbled.

Dib ignored his sisters comment and turned his attention to the tiny robot.

"You can fly this thing?"

"Yeah! I see Master fly it aaaaall the time! I can do it like potatoes!"

"You can't actually be telling me we're letting this idiot fly, right?" Gaz asked, worry evident in her eyes.

"What choice do we have, Gaz? We just need to-"

xXxXx

"-scream like little kids!"

The voot cruiser jolted through the air at a sporadic and unpredictable pace. Keef had already vomited all over the windshield, but GIR was unperturbed and continued to pilot the craft in this shakey manner until they had finally broken through earth's atmosphere. Once they were free of orbit, GIR finally slowed down to an agreeable pace, and the trio shakily got to their feet.

"That was FUN! Let's do it again!"

"NO!" Gaz screamed in an uncharacteristically loud voice. "I'm driving from now on!"

"So how do we find Zim?" Keef asked.

"You could search for his bio-signature and have me fly you there," the computer's voice boomed, shocking all who were present.

"Wait, you've been here the whole time?!" Dib yelled.

"Yes."

"Then why didn't you fly the ship?!"

"You never asked."

"I hate you," Dib grumbled.

"Believe me, the feeling is mutual. Now tracking Master," the computer said as the ship blasted off into the unknown.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, how was that. In case it wasn't obvious, I got the idea for this AU from reading Issue 37 of the Invader Zim comic series, where Zim traps Dib in his holochamber and used it to create a world where he was an official member of the Membrane Family, and I thought the idea of Sibling Zim was just too cute not to have an AU based around it. Let me know what you think in the comments and I'll see you all next time.


End file.
